♥ I LOVE THE GLAM ROCKER.

♥ Thursday, January 01, 2009

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE. have a rocking good year ahead:))))
2008 just ended an hour ago. and surprisingly, im feeling kinda sad:(
i dont want 2009 to come so soon, for whatever reason.
YEAH LA THE BIG 'A' LEVELS. its stressing me out before i even start school.
sometimes i wonder whether i made the correct choice of coming to JC. maybe poly would have been better, my brain cells wouldnt have died out so quickly. and i would have a life, like i used to have. BUT, somehow poly isnt any better. everytime i see sonia online, shes either doing her report or powerpoint or speech or whatever work that she has. so yeah, poly is kinda tough, in a way. hmm. shall console myself in this way so i wont think that i've made a wrong choice.
and i always do that. convince myself that im correct. which, in other words, means that im running away from reality. cos reality sucks. i think, im like, an ostrich. but one with an awfully small head and huge body. cos, its so easy for me to avoid reality and stop myself from thinking about it. but yet deep in my heart i know its always there and i cant run nor hide. it sucks you know. like, constantly have to run away from something. its not that i wanna run away from things, but, sometimes, i just dont have the time or strength to deal with it. maybe running away is better. at least i can be happier for a longer time. its so much better to stay in my own world, stare at the sky and dream, than to open my eyes and realise that reality sucks big time.
and so, the snowballing effect continues. and, when you finally open your eyes, you see the sky falling, and you cant hide anymore. the problem is right infront of you, so deal with it. if that were the case for me, id choose to remain ignorant, and let the sky fall, and my problems shall be buried with me:))) just a thought, nothing serious or anything yeah.
im just, feeling emo about 2009. for the many many things that are about to come my way. and most of them will rob me of my time and life and brain cells and my PRECIOUS SLEEP. but i'll just have to deal with it, dont i. BUT still, i will say, i'll deal with it when the time comes. so for now, someone just talk to me, and distract me so i wont feel like puking when i think about 2009.
i hate to be alone.

rockstar!, 1:13 AM
..head in the cloud